Yesterday I was trying to write something….. I was finally understating the idea of space in a couple, based, of course, on my previous experience. I remember how I turned, from an independent girl, to a control-controlled freak. And this happened only because I let C. invade my space and I invaded his. And I also remember that some time ago I regretted my hurry for intimacy, because I needed my space and I couldn’t get it back… But right now this need for space was also a test…I thought that he could miss me, realize that I might mean something more than before. Well, “prognosis negative” to quote from Seinfeld…. That made me really sad. But I got to the conclusion that falling in love is not necessary for loving, that falling in love can be disastrous, but loving is not, that a relationship is not a struggle, a fight of who influences who or a process of adjusting to each other…by force and empowered by pheromones. Because sometimes it just happens to find somebody that doesn’t require all those complicated actions. The routine calls for the torment, but it’s vain. Hence, the frustration.
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I just feel that I belong with him, that’s all. And this, as far as I know, is pretty fucking rare. But I can’t ask him to feel the same if he doesn’t.
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Can one fall in love after a while? Can one wake up one morning and discover that he\/she is in love?
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Relationships are like the lottery I think. Or like a box of chocolates. You never know what you gonna get.
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Yesterday I was trying to write something….. I was finally understating the idea of space in a couple, based, of course, on my previous experience. I remember how I turned, from an independent girl, to a control-controlled freak. And this … Continue reading