my life or something like it

Now I do have all the freedom in the world to finally do whatever I want….and I don’t. I guess I’m stuck in the past, in my past habits and mental setups, I’m dealing with different people here and I can’t adjust, I just judge them according to these setups. When i shouldn’t judge anyone at all, when I should accept them for what they are… It’s so difficult that I can’t do it all alone. Coz I don’t rationalize them all and in the end I’m the one crying, all because of me:((. I need patient understanding people around…but this kind of patience doesn’t come out of the blue. Who’s gonna be that patient as to understand me every time I go crazy, every time I’m sad or happy for no reason, every time I am too sensitive about meaningless things that may mean a great deal to me? Who could be able to find me answers when I ask questions, who’s gonna be able to love me for what i am not for what I might be?
I know, I know…..today i’m such a cry-baby, I hate myself for that really, but this is how I need to write it, to exorcise it out of me and to relax at last…
Yes, not in a perfect mood indeed, but I’m ok.
and yes, stable:).